The holidays are a wonderful time to reconnect with friends and family and practice gratitude. But the holidays can be a double-edged sword because they involve many emotions.
They offer the joy of reconnection but also stress. They bring excitement but also exhaustion.
Part of the issue is that we have higher expectations about the holidays. Social psychologist Dr. Gordon explains the link between expectations and being grateful:
“When we expect something, we feel resentful when that expectation is not filled. But if instead we don’t expect anything, we will feel grateful for what we do receive. For example, some research shows that we feel resentful when a family member doesn’t help us out (and little gratitude when they do) because we expect help from family. However, we feel a lot of gratitude if a stranger helps us out (and little resentment if they don’t) because we have no expectation of help from a stranger.”
This captures a common sentiment affecting 64% of adults during the holiday season where our expectations are not met. This can be frustrating when surrounded by happy holiday symbolism. Many feel a sense of loss, loneliness or disappointment known as the holiday blues. At the same time, higher social demands and darker days during the holidays can leave us feeling more tired than usual. Gratitude can help us shift away from a low mood and regain appreciation, but it takes more than just a fleeting grateful thought.
Even though gratitude is already a holiday tradition, studies show we have a lot to gain by committing to regular gratitude practices. Much like showering, gratitude practices seem to be most effective when practiced daily or at least several times a week. Gratitude helps us move away from a self-centered thought process because it directs us to think of others, which enhances wellbeing, resilience, and our sense of community.
Some are able to adopt a more grateful mindset simply by thinking about it. Most of us need a tangible practice to optimize gratitude, some way to make the practice easier to reflect on. This is why most studies use some form of writing to capture and document moments of appreciation. A gratitude journal can be used to recognize what we are grateful for on a daily basis.
With each day prompting a small, personalized lists, we can identify exactly why we are grateful and refer to it in times of need. This practice enhances our well-being. Plus, future feelings of gratitude. As a result, a gratitude journal helps us notice new reasons and things in our lives for which to be grateful.
Being grateful is not a passive experience. Imaging studies indicate that many areas of the brain are active when are grateful. These areas are involved in thinking about how we fit in with our social group and moral reasoning, and help us to feel closer to others. Perhaps this is why gratitude protects and improves our interpersonal relationships.
Not all kinds of gratitude refer to others, as some items on your list could be appreciating the weather, the warmth of your home, or the plentiful food you have. Gratitude for things and situations can still benefit your view of the world because you are noticing how things are going your way, rather than the common tendency to focus on what is wrong. Even when we are not focusing on gratitude for others, studies show that daily gratitude journaling reduces feelings of loneliness and can improve mental health.
One of the leading ideas behind how gratitude works involves the calming effect it produces. Gratitude practices such as journaling may activate special receptors that dampen our perception of pain, stress and loneliness (called mu-opioid receptors). Instead of noticing the negatives, gratitude helps you practice noticing the positives in our lives.
Ready to make a commitment to a happier, more appreciative mindset?
If you are interested in personal growth, consider starting with a daily journaling practice. List why you are grateful at the beginning or end of your day. Reflect on your journal entries whenever you need reminders for a mood-lifting experience. Some Treo members use the Treo Habit Builder to focus on stress releasing activities such as journaling, and they can opt in to helpful text reminder to stay track with their daily goal.
Teams and employee groups also benefit from recognition practices. By helping us focus on the positives in our lives, being thankful for what we have, help us avoid burnout. Also, gratitude can help us engage in more prosocial helping behavior at work that can benefit productivity. In addition to journaling, being thankful to those you work with directly also improves team dynamics and supports cooperation. Together, journaling and expressing appreciation to coworker increases job satisfaction – by as much as 18%!
As Treo’s Global Wellness Researcher, Karlie uses recent research findings to support healthier daily habits. Karlie earned her doctorate in Neuroscience and Behavior and bachelors in Health and Exercise Science.
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